I just noticed a woman breastfeeding her baby here in Panera Bread. While I can certainly identify with her, and recognize the baby’s hungry cry, and smile at the baby’s relaxed posture and wiggling toes as she is nursing, I find myself still feeling wistful, but not quite as sad as I used to be when I’d see a breastfeeding mother. I feel like I really had a strong bond with Ryan while we were breastfeeding. We still have a strong bond, but it’s not quite like the intimacy of breastfeeding. But the again, he is growing up…

And while I feel wistful, I don’t feel sad. That’s good, I think. I love newborns and little babies in general, but there’s so much to love about them when they reach 2 and 3 and 4 years of age, too. I miss the closeness of breastfeeding, and how sweet and cuddly and precious Ryan was as a newborn and as a baby, but I certainly enjoy his high spirits and rambunctiousness as a two (almost three!) year old, too!

And speaking of growing up… Ryan’s third birthday is this Sunday! Ahh!

Tags: ryan

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