One of the biggest and most monumental transformations a woman can make is to become a mother. It is not just a change in emotions, lifestyle and outlook, it also changes the whole dynamic of the previously one on one relationship you had with your partner pre baby. Sex is often the last thing on your mind after your body has gone through such dramatic change and women usually experience a big drop in their libido. The passionate love making which produced the offspring seems a thing of the past, and even your favourite sex toy languishes in a drawer, gathering dust. Here are some of the reasons women have given to explain their loss of desire;
- Exhaustion and tiredness.
- Physically feel and look different.
- Feel like everyone wants to invade you, especially if you’re breast feeding.
- Afraid it will be painful, maybe after difficult labour.
- Worried about waking the baby.
This is all without mentioning the hormonal roller coaster a new mother experiences and there are many others factors, which all play a contributing part. However, sex is an important part of most loving relationships and needs to be nurtured as much as your relationship to maintain a happy balance. It is a good idea to discuss your feelings with your partner and help them to understand why you have gone off sex. This will also help you to assess your own desire and maybe even consider what you can do to reignite your sex life.
If you can overcome your objections to sexual activity, you may find becoming intimate with your loved one has these beneficial effects;
- Reaffirms the bond you have with your partner.
- Reassures your partner they haven’t been pushed out.
- Helps you get back into shape.
- Makes you feel you are a sensual sexual being rather than a baby-making machine.
- Provides tension relief.
- Good opportunity to try new things
So, when and where is a good place to begin after the birth? Only you will be able to decide when the time is right for you both mentally and physically. Never feel pressured or as if you are being difficult or obstructive by not wanting sex. Maybe first try experimenting on your own with a sex toy or some lube because there could be changes to your anatomy, which you would be more comfortable discovering on your own.
Relax, take your time, and allow yourself to feel the same sensual, sexual pleasure you have previously enjoyed, just make sure that the baby is settled!
My name is Jenn, and I'm 27 years old. I'm happily married to my best friend and soulmate, Daniel. Together we have a six year old daughter named 
Name: Alyssa
Name: Ryan
